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6pak

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Everything posted by 6pak

  1. A man and his wife were driving home one very cold night when the wifeasks her husband to stop the car. There was a baby skunk lying at the sideof the road, and she got out to see if it was still alive. It was, and she said to her husband, "It's nearly frozen to death. Canwe take it with us, get it warm, and let it go in the morning?" He says, "O.K., get in the car with it." "Where shall I put it to get it warm?" He says, "Put it in between your legs. It's nice and warm there." "But what about the smell?" "Just hold its little nose." And then the fight started!
  2. 6pak

    My Next Life

    That's it Yammer, spoil the fun with logic! :rotfl:
  3. I want to live my next life backwards! You start out dead and get that out of the way right off the bat. Then, you wake up in a nursing home feeling better every day. When you are kicked out of the home for being too healthy, you spend several years enjoying your retirement and collecting benefit checks. When you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day. You work 40 years or so, getting younger every day until pretty soon you're too young to work. So then, you go to high school: play sports, date, drink, and party. As you get even younger, you become a kid again. You go to elementary school, play, and have no responsibilities. In a few years, you become a baby, and everyone runs themselves ragged keeping you happy. You spend your last 9 months floating peacefully in luxury, spa-like conditions: central heating, room service on tap. Until finally . . . You finish off as an orgasm. I rest my case.
  4. Manure : In the 16th and 17th centuries, everything had to be transported by ship and it was also before the invention of commercial fertilizers, so large shipments of manure were quite common. It was shipped dry, because in dry form it weighed a lot less than when wet, but once water (at sea) hit it, not only did it become heavier, but the process of fermentation began again, of which a by product is methane gas of course. As the stuff was stored below decks in bundles you can see what could (and did) happen. Methane began to build up below decks and the first time someone came below at night with a lantern, BOOOOM! Several ships were destroyed in this manner before it was determined just what was happening After that, the bundles of manure were always stamped with the instruction ' Stow high in transit ' on them, which meant for the sailors to stow it high enough off the lower decks so that any water that came into the hold would not touch this volatile cargo and start the production of methane. Thus evolved the term ' S.H.I.T ', (Stow High In Transit) which has come down through the centuries and is in use to this very day. You probably did not know the true history of this word. Neither did I. I had always thought it was a golf term.
  5. I had a pretty good fathers day. Spent the day at my son Jakes house helping him put up a 24' pool. we leveled the dirt on sat, then put up the wall on sun am. got the liner in it early yesterday afternoon, got it stretched and started filling it. gonna put the top rails on tuesday night. So since we worked all fathers day weekend, we have a golf date for next sunday am, then gonna spend next sunday pm in the pool with him, his wife, and the grandkids, with a bucket of margaritas for the adults.
  6. Rumor has it that Congressman Anthony Weiner is going to run for president. He has chosen Attorney General Eric Holder as his running mate. Get your Weiner-Holder bumper stickers early, before they are all gone
  7. No Sunday Paper: This is dedicated to all of us who are seniors, to all of you who know seniors, and to all of you who will become seniors. Where is my SUNDAY paper?!" The irate customer calling the newspaper office, loudly demanded to know where her Sunday edition was. "Madam", said the newspaper employee, "today is Saturday. The Sunday paper is not delivered until tomorrow, on SUNDAY". There was quite a long pause on the other end of the phone, followed by a ray of recognition as she was heard to mutter, ..."Well, $**t, that explains why no one was at church either."
  8. In the line at the store, the cashier told the older woman that she should > >>>bring her own grocery bag because plastic bags weren't good for the > >>>environment. > >>>The woman apologized to him and explained, > >>>"We didn't have the green thing back in my day." > >>> > >>>The clerk responded, "That's our problem today. > >>>The former generation did not care enough to save our environment." > >>> > >>>He was right; that generation didn't have the "green thing" in its day. > >>> > >>>Back then, they returned their milk bottles, > >>>soda bottles and beer bottles to the store. > >>>The store sent them back to the plant to be washed > >>>and sterilized and refilled, > >>>so it could use the same bottles over and over. > >>>So they really were recycled. > >>> > >>>But they didn't have the "green thing" back in that customer's day. > >>> > >>>In her day, they walked up stairs, > >>>because they didn't have an escalator in every store and office building. > >>>They walked to the grocery store and > >>>didn't climb into a 300-horsepower machine > >>>every time they had to go two blocks. > >>> > >>>But she was right. They didn't have the "green thing" in her day. > >>> > >>>Back then, they washed the baby's diapers > >>>because they didn't have the throw-away kind. > >>>They dried clothes on a line, > >>>not in an energy gobbling machine burning up 220 volts - > >>>wind and solar power really did dry the clothes. > >>>Kids got hand-me-down clothes from their brothers or sisters, > >>>not always brand-new clothing. > >>> > >>>But that old lady is right, they didn't have the "green thing" back in her > >day. > >>> > >>>Back then, they had one TV, or radio, in the house - > >>>not a TV in every room. > >>>And the TV had a small screen the size of a handkerchief, > >>>not a screen the size of the state of Montana . > >>>In the kitchen, they blended and stirred by hand because > >>>they didn't have electric machines to do everything for you. > >>>When they packaged a fragile item to send in the mail, > >>>they used a wadded up old newspaper to cushion it, > >>>not Styrofoam or plastic bubble wrap. > >>> > >>>Back then, they didn't fire up an engine and burn gasoline > >>>just to cut the lawn. They used a push mower that ran on human power. > >>>They exercised by working so they didn't need to go to a health club > >>>to run on treadmills that operate on electricity. > >>> > >>>But she's right, they didn't have the "green thing" back then. > >>> > >>>They drank from a fountain when they were thirsty > >>>instead of using a cup or a plastic bottle every time > >>>they had a drink of water. > >>>They refilled their writing pens with ink instead of buying a new pen, > >>>and they replaced the razor blades in a razor > >>>instead of throwing away the whole razor just because the blade got dull. > >>> > >>>But they didn't have the "green thing" back then. > >>> > >>>Back then, people took the streetcar or a bus > >>>and kids rode their bikes to school or walked > >>>instead of turning their moms into a 24-hour taxi service. > >>>They had one electrical outlet in a room, > >>>not an entire bank of sockets to power a dozen appliances. > >>>And they didn't need a computerized gadget > >>>to receive a signal beamed from satellites 2,000 miles out in space > >>>in order to find the nearest pizza joint. > >>> > >>>But isn't it sad the current generation laments how wasteful the old folks > >>>were just because they didn't have the "green thing" back then? >
  9. Yeah, got it mounted last weekend.. Mounted speakers to mirror mounts. put amp in the little leather bag I have mounted on the back of the fairing. I want to get a bigger bag then it will be permanent in there. A couple thoughts. First of all, very simple to install. I think about 10 minutes from opening the box to powering on. Doesn't sound bad. even at highway speed, you can understand what your listening to. The built in antenna is kinda weak, and there isn't a jack to plug in an external one. It does have a USB port, so you can plug in a flash drive or MP3 player. All in all, I would say that it was well worth the $115 I spent on it.
  10. This was written by Robert St. John, executive chef and owner of the Purple Parrot Cafe, Crescent City Grill and Mahogany Bar of Hattiesburg , MS. Thirty years ago I visited my first cousin in Virginia . While hanging out with his friend, the discussion turned to popular movies of the day. When I offered my two-cents on the authenticity and social relevance of the movie Billy Jack, one of the boys asked, in all seriousness; 'Do you guys have movie theaters down there?' To which I replied, 'Yep. We wear shoes too.' Just three years ago, my wife and I were attending a food and wine seminar in Aspen , Colo. We were seated with two couples from Las Vegas . One of the Glitter Gulch gals was amused and downright rude when I described our restaurant as a fine-dining restaurant. ' Mississippi doesn't have fine-dining restaurants!' she insisted and nudged her companion. I fought back the strong desire to mention that she lived in the land that invented the 99-cent breakfast buffet. I wanted badly to defend my state, my region, and my restaurant with a 15-minute soliloquy and public relations rant that would surely change her mind. It was at that precise moment that I was hit with a blinding jolt of enlightenment, and in a moment of complete and absolute clarity it dawned on me -- my South is the best-kept secret in the country. Why would I try to win this woman over? She might move down here. I am always amused by Holly wood 's interpretation of the South. We are still, on occasion, depicted as a collective group of sweaty, stupid, backwards-minded, racist rednecks. The South of movies and TV, the Holly wood South, is not my South. This is my South: "My South is full of honest, hardworking people. My South is the birthplace of blues and jazz, and rock n' roll. It has banjo pickers and fiddle players, but it also has BB King, Muddy Waters, the Allman Brothers, Emmylou Harris and Elvis - and Leontyn Price. My South is hot. My South smells of newly mowed grass. My South was kick the can, creek swimming, cane-pole fishing and bird hunting. In my South, football is king, and the Southeastern Conference is the kingdom. My South is home to the most beautiful women on the planet. In my South, soul food and country cooking are the same thing. My South is full of fig preserves, cornbread, butter beans, fried chicken, grits and catfish. In my South we eat foie gras, caviar and truffles. In my South, our transistor radios introduced us to the Beatles and the Rolling Stones at the same time they were introduced to the rest of the country. In my South, grandmothers cook a big lunch every Sunday, so big that we call it dinner (supper comes later). In my South, family matters, deeply. My South is boiled shrimp, blackberry cobbler, peach ice cream, banana pudding and oatmeal cream pies. In my South people put peanuts in bottles of Coca-Cola and hot sauce on almost everything. In my South the tea is iced and almost as sweet as the women. My South has air-conditioning. My South is camellias, azaleas, wisteria and hydrangeas. In my South, the only person that has to sit on the back of the bus is the last person that got on the bus. In my South, people still say 'Yes, ma'am,' 'No ma'am,' 'Please' and 'Thank you.' In my South, we all wear shoes....most of the time. My South is the best-kept secret in the country. Please continue to keep the secret....it keeps the idiots away."
  11. About a month ago, I posted on here about a buddy of mine Having an accident during a poker run. When I talked with Roger he told me that the bike, HD RK, just started to wobble in a curve. i just sent him this link. He has a steel rod in his hip, and uses a walker. No telling if or when he can go back to work (he drives a concrete mixer) or get on the bike again. His bike is in the shop with about $7000 in repairs needed.
  12. It's a Shark Audio System SHKMSM2050K for my '98 RSTD. $115 and change. I'll let y'all know how it sounds and post some pics once I get it on the bike. That includes the system itself, a pair of handlebar brackets for the speakers, and shipping. I heard one of these on a Roak King a couple months ago, sounded pretty good. If you haven't seen or heard one, check out Shark Audio on you tube.
  13. Star 9" quantity 2 Thanks.
  14. A young Texan grew up wanting to be a law man. He grew up big, 6' 2’ strong as a longhorn, and fast as a mustang. He could shoot a bottle cap tossed in the air at 40 paces. When he finally came of age, he applied to where he had only dreamed of working: the West Texas Sheriff's Department. After a big mess of tests and interviews, the Chief Deputy BOB finally called him into his office for the young man's last interview. The Chief Deputy said, "You're a big strong kid and you can really shoot. So far your qualifications all look real good, but we have what you might call an 'attitude suitability test' that you must take before you can be accepted. We just don't let anyone carry our badge son." Then, sliding a service pistol and a box of ammo across the desk, the Chief said, "Take this pistol and go out and shoot: six illegal aliens, six lawyers, six meth dealers, six Muslim extremists, six sex ofenders and a rabbit" "Why the rabbit?" "Great attitude. You pass." says the Chief Deputy. "When can you start?"
  15. Osamas Last FB post
  16. The question about beer is a good point. Since I rode up after the fact, all I know is what I was told. Roger had one beer about 30 minutes before the ride started. This came from his riding partner. I've known Roger for quite a while, and can vouch that he can hold a lot! So I think that he just made a very stupid mistake. As for bar hopping, the first stop was at a bike shop, the second was at a convenience store, third was at a bar, the fourth was at the local wingmans clubhouse, and the ride finished at the American Legion. Normally, these things are a lot of fun. You draw a card at each stop. and normally draw the last card where the ride started at. Prizes for best, second and third best hands, 50/50 drawing and door prizes. Personally, I drink a lot of water on these things. Save my 6pak for when the bike is parked. Y'all keep safe.
  17. I went on a poker run Saturday. It started out to be a very pretty day, left the house about 8am to run up to Rincon to pick up Donna. Got back here about 11, but the ride had left out about 30 minutes before we got signed up. Knowing how these things work, I figured we could take our time and catch the group by the 2nd or 3rd stop. So Heading for the first stop, a GSP goes flying by us. Then an ambulance. Started wondering. We come around a curve, and theres about 50 bikes, a couple firetrucks, 2 deputy cruisers, the GSP, and the ambulance. It turns out that one of the road guards, figured that he needed to get back to the front to play road guard again, instead of falling in at the back of the group. So he goes flying past the group, gets around half of them, and loses it. hit a tight curve around 80 mph on his Road King. Thank god the curve was a right hand curve or he would have taken out a half dozen other bikes with him. He went off the road, through about a 100 feet of tall grass before finding the trees. He did manage to get it slowed down to the point that he crushed his right leg, Now has a steel rod. And a severe concussion. Needless to say, his bike is toast. But he'll live to tell his story. So Anyways, after an hour delay, we did finish the ride, But this kinda took the fun element out of it for most of us. Roger is gonna be ok, If his wife Julie has her say, he'll never ride again. Anyhow about a 250 mile day. mid 80s, very nice day. Didn't even bother to stick around to see who won. Gave 50/50 tickets to one of the organizers and asked them to give the cash to Roger if I won. Liability only on his bike, he may be able to piece it back together. Depending on frame and forks.
  18. All arrivals in heaven have to go through a bureaucratic examination to determine whether admission will be granted. One room has a clerk who inputs computerized records of what each applicant did on his or her last day of life. The first applicant of the day explains that his last day was not a good one. "I came home early and found my wife lying naked in bed. She claimed she had just gotten out of the shower. Well, her hair was dry and I checked the shower and it was completely dry too. I knew she was into some hanky-panky and I began to look for her lover. I went onto the balcony of our 9th floor apartment and found the SOB clinging to the rail by his finger tips. I was so angry that I began bashing his fingers with a flower pot. He let go and fell, but his fall was broken by some awnings and bushes. On seeing he was still alive I found super human strength to drag our antique cedar chest to the balcony and throw it over. It hit the man and killed him. At this point the stress got to me and I suffered a massive heart attack and died." The clerk thanked him and sent him on to the next office. The second applicant said that his last day was his worst. "I was on the roof of an apartment building working on the AC equipment. I stumbled over my tools and toppled off the building. I managed to grab onto the balcony rail of a 9th floor apartment but some idiot came rushing out on the balcony and bashed my hands with a flower pot. I fell but hit some awnings and bushes and survived, but as I looked up I saw a huge chest falling toward me. I tried to crawl out of the way but failed and was hit and killed by the chest." The clerk couldn't help but chuckle as he directs the man to the next room. He is still giggling when his third customer of the day enters. He apologizes and says "I doubt that your last day was as interesting as the fellow in here just before you." "I don't know" replies the man, "picture this, I'm buck naked hiding' in this cedar chest....."
  19. I am wondering if anyone out there knows of an aftermarket set of pipes that will fit my RSTD? I cannot find anything that fits older that a 99. Will the HD road king pipes fit? I am getting the idea that they won't. Just a thought, but my brother has the stock pipes from his heritage softail hanging in the garage collecting dust.
  20. If all else fails, do what I did when my patience ran out. Call your local congressman. My paperwork was done by the DAV, and they pushed it all the way to the VA, where it sat on a desk for months. Called Jack Kingstons office, 3 days later I get a phone call from VA, to tell me they were hand carrying my paperwork thru. 2 weeks later the checks started.
  21. 6pak

    41 mpg?

    Stand proud you noble swingers of clubs and losers of balls.... A recent study found the average golfer walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found golfers drink, on average, 22 gallons of alcohol a year. That means, on average, golfers get about 41 miles to the gallon. Kind of makes you proud. Almost feel like a “hybrid.”
  22. A man had just settled into his seat next to the window on the plane when Another man sat down in the aisle seat and put his black Labrador Retriever In the middle seat next to the man. The first man looked very quizzically at the dog and asked why the dog was Allowed on the plane. The second man explained that he was a DEA agent and that the dog was a 'sniffing dog'. 'His name is Sniffer and he's the best there is. I'll show you once we get airborne, when I put him to work.' The plane took off, and once it has leveled out, the agent said, 'Watch This.' He told Sniffer to 'search.' Sniffer jumped down, walked along the aisle, and finally sat very Purposefully next to a woman for several seconds. Sniffer then returned to his seat and put one paw on the agent's arm. The agent said, 'Good boy', and he turned to the man and said, 'That woman Is in possession of marijuana, so I'm making a note of her seat number and The authorities will apprehend her when we land. 'Say, that's pretty neat,' replied the first man. Once again, the agent sent Sniffer to search the aisles. The lab sniffed about, sat down beside a man for a few seconds, returned to Its seat, and this time he placed two paws on the agent's arm. The agent said, 'That man is carrying cocaine, so again, I'm making a note Of his seat number for the police.' I like it!' said his seat mate. The agent then told Sniffer to 'search' again.. Sniffer walked up and down the aisles for a little while, sat down for a Moment, and then came racing back to the agent, jumped into the middle seat And proceeded to crap all over the place. The first man was really grossed out by this behavior and couldn't figure Out how or why a well-trained dog would behave like that, so he asked the Agent, 'What's going on?' The agent nervously replied, 'He just found a bomb.'
  23. 6pak

    Charlie

    Here's more on Charlie for ya! How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen Consume? Enough to kill 2 and 1/2 Men!
  24. Living just down the road from Savannah, I have seen this on the news quite a bit in the past couple days. A couple points. First, they are checking for DOT helmets. While I'm not going to go into whether or not I agree with Georgias helmet laws, we do have them. More and more I have seen the "novelty" helmets on the road. These state right on them that they are not for protection in a crash. So I guess on paper that I would agree with the CP for correct helmets. However, the money would imho be better spent on a few public service announcements to try to make the public aware of Bikes and Bikers. If you run across SR144 from Ft Stewart to the I95 interchange, you will see at least 5 billboards letting folks know that bikes are out there. The only Problem with this is that this is on a state highway but is going thru a Federal Installation. So for the most part the only people who will ever see these signs have already seen them. I guess what I'm trying to say is that the CPs don't need to raise our awareness, We're the ones that ride to start with. I'm pretty sure that we are already aware. Use the money to make the public better aware thru advertising. Just my
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