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Showing results for tags 'laughing'.
Found 10 results
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Love Old Women AN OLD WOMAN PROSPECTOR SHUFFLED INTO TOWN LEADING A TIRED OLD MULE. THE OLD WOMAN HEADED STRAIGHT FOR THE ONLY SALOON TO CLEAR HER PARCHED THROAT. SHE WALKED UP AND TIED HER OLD MULE TO THE HITCH RAIL. AS SHE STOOD THERE, BRUSHING SOME OF THE DUST FROM HER FACE AND CLOTHES, A YOUNG GUNSLINGER STEPPED OUT OF THE SALOON WITH A GUN IN ONE HAND AND A BOTTLE OF WHISKEY IN THE OTHER. The young gunslinger looked at the old woman and laughed, saying, "Hey Old WOMAN, have you ever danced?" THE OLD WOMAN LOOKED UP AT THE GUNSLINGER AND SAID, "NO, I NEVER DID DANCE... NEVER REALLY WANTED TO." A CROWD HAD GATHERED AS THE GUNSLINGER GRINNED AND SAID, "WELL, YOU OLD BAG, YOU'RE GONNA DANCE NOW," AND STARTED SHOOTING AT THE OLD WOMAN'S FEET. THE OLD WOMAN PROSPECTOR - NOT WANTING TO GET HER TOE BLOWN OFF -STARTED HOPPING AROUND. EVERYBODY WAS LAUGHING. WHEN HIS LAST BULLET HAD BEEN FIRED, THE YOUNG GUNSLINGER, STILL LAUGHING, HOLSTERED HIS GUN AND TURNED AROUND TO GO BACK INTO THE SALOON. THE OLD WOMAN TURNED TO HER PACK MULE, PULLED OUT A DOUBLE-BARRELED SHOTGUN, AND COCKED BOTH HAMMERS. THE LOUD CLICKS CARRIED CLEARLY THROUGH THE DESERT AIR. THE CROWD STOPPED LAUGHING IMMEDIATELY. THE YOUNG GUNSLINGER HEARD THE SOUNDS TOO, AND HE TURNED AROUND VERY SLOWLY. THE SILENCE WAS ALMOST DEAFENING. THE CROWD WATCHED AS THE YOUNG GUNMAN STARED AT THE OLD WOMAN AND THE LARGE GAPING HOLES OF THOSE TWIN BARRELS. THE BARRELS OF THE SHOTGUN NEVER WAVERED IN THE OLD WOMAN'S HANDS, AS SHE QUIETLY SAID, "SON, HAVE YOU EVER LICKED A MULE'S ASS?” THE GUNSLINGER SWALLOWED HARD AND SAID, "NO MAAM... BUT... I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO." THERE ARE A FEW LESSONS FOR US ALL HERE: 1 - Never be arrogant. 2 - Don't waste ammunition. 3 - Whiskey makes you think you're smarter than you are. 4 - Always, always make sure you know who has the power. 5 - Don't mess with old women; they didn't get old by being stupid... I JUST LOVE A STORY WITH A HAPPY ENDING, DON'T YOU?
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Here are the pictures from this weekend! We are still laughing about Honeybee's "birthday" at Texas Roadhouse! Yee Haw!!!:dancefool: http://s7.photobucket.com/albums/y262/venturerider/Sleeperhawks%20Mechanic/2012/Sleeperhawks%20Mechanic%202012%20August%20Asheville/
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Codes for Seniors Texting ATD.....At The Doctors. BFF......Best Friend Fell. BTW.......Bring the Wheelchair. BYOT........Bring Your Own Teeth. FWIW.......Forgot Where I Was. GGPBL.......Gotta Go Pacemaker Battery Low. GHA.......Got Heartburn Again. IMHAO......Is My Hearing-Aid On. LMDO......Laughing My Dentures Out. OMMR.....On My Massage Recliner. OMSG ......Oh My! Sorry, Gas. ROFLACGU.....Rolling On Floor Laughing And Can't Get Up. TTYL..........Talk To You Louder Enjoy.... :rotfl:
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I gotta ask it cause I am a firm believer that the only stupid question is the one not asked! Now before we point the bikes south it may be a real good idea to know exactly where in Arkansas we are going! What city do I punch into the GPS? BlackOwl....you can stop laughing now, you're scaring the dog!
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Gonna show how stupid I am......
Guest posted a topic in Venture and Venture Royale Tech Talk ('83 - '93)
Have new spark plug wires....figured it was time to replace the 21 year old wires. Obviously one end of the wires goes onto the plug, but never having done this before, I don't know the how and where the bare end attaches. How do I get there? Stop laughing....... -
On Sunday my wife and i were riding back to Orange Park Fl from Macon Ga.. when i felt something poke me in the back , and then something was ticking on my helmet Now here i am at 65 mph rolling down the road,, Then it dawns on me... i ask my wife " are you by chance knitting right now" and she answered " yes i am " ... i about wrecked laughing !!! leave it to my better half to find a way to knitt or quilt no matter were we are.. By the way if you ever see a 2000 M/M venture rolling down the road with a rider taking pictures of everything or knitting just wave:crackup: and dont wreck laughing
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Well bike is in the garage , no riding for a while stuck whit Bell's palsy , Complete half of the face paralysed .Doc said it would probably be OK in a few weeks but for now a lot of rest .How much rest do I need I'm retired LOL,,,,,,,,. Anyway got to take it easy if I want to be able to attend the rally in Kitchener . Man now the wife is laughing at me ,she says that I look like an old bull dog ,I'm fat grumpy and I drooling all over the place ,,,,, :rotf:
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After a 1000km day on the way home from Colorado: Young Buck-Thud [ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qd3yU2TzJDM]http://i.ytimg.com/vi/qd3yU2TzJDM/default.jpg[/ame] vs Old Rooster-Reiny [ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3A53cFLaACE]http://i.ytimg.com/vi/3A53cFLaACE/default.jpg[/ame] Keep playing this over and over, I never stop laughing. :rotf::rotf: Reiny,It took me a while but I figured it out.
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Christmas has been cancelled. It's all YOUR fault! You told Santa that you were GOOD this year. http://by108w.bay108.mail.live.com/mail/SafeRedirect.aspx?hm__tg=http://65.54.162.249/att/GetAttachment.aspx&hm__qs=file%3d519b07ab-df9e-4aa1-a810-9f3620af355c.gif%26ct%3daW1hZ2UvZ2lm%26name%3daW1hZ2UwMDIyMzIyLmdpZg_3d_3d%26inline%3d1%26rfc%3d0%26empty%3dFalse%26imgsrc%3dcid%253aD4074469-3BA2-4750-AED5-90C227B2F2C0&oneredir=1&ip=10.1.106.206&d=d1291&mf=0 AND HE DIED LAUGHING!
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We just picked up this video and watched it this weekend. For those who have it, who spotted the white Tour Deluxe? It was only shown for a few seconds, but it was in there. Do you know what my favorite part was? Come on, guess. The part where the guy says, "Scraping your floorboards should be music to your ears". My wife just roared. I had to pause the video to let her finish laughing. She normally will poke me in the ribs if I do it with her on the back. She doesn't like that realization of how far we're leaning over. But after hearing that line and then watching and hearing how much they do it in their demonstrations, she said she will become more accepting of it. I am the pegscraper! :D
