E-Fishin-C Posted June 14, 2011 Share #1 Posted June 14, 2011 WHO IS JACK SCHITT? For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt? We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, 'You don't know Jack Schitt'! Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an intellectual way. Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, who married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack. In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her parents' objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout. After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock, and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt Sherlock. Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Horse. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt. Now when someone says, 'You don't know Jack Schitt', you can correct them. Sincerely, Crock O. Schitt :rotfl::rotfl: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yammer Dan Posted June 14, 2011 Share #2 Posted June 14, 2011 Are you related to Fulla??:rotfl: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gunboat Posted June 15, 2011 Share #3 Posted June 15, 2011 man thats a lot of schitts Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saddlebum Posted June 15, 2011 Share #4 Posted June 15, 2011 Did you read all of that off the old outhouse wall in one sittng :rotfl:Wonder how long it took the other guy to carve it into the walls Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
winston66 Posted June 15, 2011 Share #5 Posted June 15, 2011 I reckon that what has just been so elequently discribed is nothing other than the long lost relative, BEING, GOOD SCHITT, In Person. :rotf::cool10::bighug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Midicat Posted June 15, 2011 Share #6 Posted June 15, 2011 My stomach hurts from laughing so hard after reading that! Thomas Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hobscotch Posted June 15, 2011 Share #7 Posted June 15, 2011 And so it was said that each of the Schitts went to college. A smattering received their bull schitt (BS) degrees, while some received degrees of more schitt (MS), and there were two who received the coveted piled higher and deeper (PhD) degree. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marcarl Posted June 15, 2011 Share #8 Posted June 15, 2011 Haven't often met Jack,,, but Dontgivea I meet on a regular basis. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sheradan Posted June 15, 2011 Share #9 Posted June 15, 2011 Back when I was racing, my crew always reminded me I had never met Jack, and I should just drive the stupid car. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stache Posted June 15, 2011 Share #10 Posted June 15, 2011 And, of course, all of them work in the family business, a comedy club...... yup...... you guessed it...... Schitts and Giggles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Globewalker Posted June 18, 2011 Share #11 Posted June 18, 2011 ha funny and I heard that The Schitt-Happens children were ‘unplanned’ and some real little squirts Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fishrepair Posted June 19, 2011 Share #12 Posted June 19, 2011 Not that I give a Schitt but it sounds to me like you all sure know your schitt. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CaptainJoe Posted June 19, 2011 Share #13 Posted June 19, 2011 What about the younger Schitt, you know the one that went to bars every night. Believe his name was Schitt, Faced... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now