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The Saddest Day of My Life


Wrongway

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I just got off the phone with Allan. He is doing OK considering the circumstances. He is pretty devastated as any of us would be but though his grief is heavy..his attitude is good. I hurt for him but I know he will be OK. He truly appreciated the outpouring of love and concern from all of us.

 

Brad and Lonna, Black Owl and Cinderella made it to the funeral. May have been some others also.

 

Just so you all know, we did send flowers from the VentureRiders.

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Glad to hear you made it home safely Lowell.........We just got home.........

 

The service Friday for Debbie was very nice, and I wont lie when I say how hard it was to face that she is gone.

 

Brad and Lonna went down with Allan to her burial service today and Pegstr was planning to attend also. Wish we could have attended that part also but we had to get back today.

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Allan just turned on the computer and read the post. So sorry to hear about Debbie. To say I was shocked was and understatement. Was great to get to know you both at Vogel last year. Thoughts and prayers for you and the family.

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Allan so sorry to hear of your loss. Debbie was a wonderful person and Ramona often spoke about her from Vogel.Life is so short. Draw strength from family,friends,and the Lord. Let the good times and precious memories help sustain you from here. I to have treasures layed up in Heaven and long for that reunion where death will be no more. Our prayers are with you.

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As I read this I am stunned and truely heartbroken for you. Laura and I met you both at Vogal and are so saddened.

Laura has been with some of her family down in lower Alabama for about three weeks(there was a death there also). I have really missed her and tomorrow is out 38th anniversary.

You are in our prayers and I wish you all the strength you will need.

RandyA

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Allen,

 

Prayers from Nashua, NH are being said.

 

Your friendship w/ each other & those you came in contact with is as clear to see here as the sky is blue.

 

If you haven't done so already, give Pegstr a call. He can tell you better than I can of what you have yet to face. I'm sure these days are so very heavy & dark. But that darkness will pass. Your tears are normal. The pain is very real. Don't fight it, but rather... let that pain do the work it has to do. You will emerge from this. When you do, you will have a clearer picture of life & of love than most folks ever do.

 

Peace,

 

Joe

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Guest SALTY

Allan, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. We have never met in person and that really doesnt matter. Take comfort in your memories and family.

May our Creator guide through the days and weeks ahead and help you find comfort!

 

Salty & Margot

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  • 1 month later...

Allan,

 

How are you doing? If you can, tell us about what you're doing good at & where it still hurts.

 

As remote as we all may be, we do still think of you & pray that you're doing ok.

 

As I re-read some of the posts here, I know I'm speaking for more than just myself.

 

Joe

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Guest nemo_gypsy

This is the first time I have ever read this post. Man, I'm sooooo sorry to hear of your loss.

 

I'll have one for you and your ol lady tonight. Bottoms up:(

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Pyro, thanks for nudging me a little bit.

 

Today is 8 weeks from Debbie's passing. I've pretty much back into the routine of life. Get up, go to work and come home. Come back to the empty home. The quiet, sad, lifeless, empty home. I miss Debbie so much that the pain is still excruciating. I still cry for her (and my loss) everyday. The good thing is that I don't cry all day and I am able to function at work and put on a good front. Our son who is 24 is bottling every thing up, won't talk about it and thinks he is too strong to need to open up. I worry about him too.

I went out for a long ride this weekend and just kept thinking how much Debbie would have enjoyed it. Kind of takes some of the joy out of it.

 

I am still planning on going to the Ft. Collins Rally. Debbie had been looking forward to that since September!

 

I have also planted a "memorial" garden for her here at the house. We put down five rose bushes with some solar lights placed around, her angel statue from the funeral, and another angel that Lonna sent me.

 

Everybody here has been so wonderful. I'm able to pick up the phone and call anyone whenever I need to "get it out" Still get lots of PM's and emails too. I appreciate everything that has been done. This VR family has shown me nothing but real, no strings attached love.

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Allan,

 

Thanks for plugging us in again. We all need to see how you are doing & we all need to learn the life lessons you are teaching us. Between you, Missy & Pegstr, this gang of hard ass hearts are being reminded of the tenderness of life because of you.

 

I'm no shrink. (That's my wife's profession) But between talks I've had with her & my own life experiences (that are only remotely comparable,) I'd guess You probably still have another one or two months of crying everyday. Then it'll be every other day, then sometimes a week will go by before you are reminded of the pain & brought back to the point of tears again.

 

The lows you feel will slowly not be so low. And the time between them will lengthen as time heals your heart. These lows have a job to do. Let that job happen. You are becoming a better man because of what you are going thru & what you are teaching us with your posts. (Here & on Debbie's memorial site.)

 

It's called temporary situational depression to a mental health professional, but we all here call it by another name, "genuine love."

 

 

Joe

 

 

 

Pyro, thanks for nudging me a little bit.

 

Today is 8 weeks from Debbie's passing. ......snip......

 

This VR family has shown me nothing but real, no strings attached love.

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