Who's got the funniest one liner?

[Yama Mama]

Her face is like 12 miles of bad road.

Beauty is only skin deep; but ugly is clear to the bone,

I have hung a weeks worth of wash on a shorter line than that.

She was so fat, when she sat around the house.......she sat around the house.

 

That's all I can think of now. Where is Rodney Dangerfield when you need him?

 

Yama Mama:hurts:

Edited November 28, 2008 by Yama Mama

[Brake Pad]

She's a carpenders dream, Flat as a board and easy to screw

 

(watching a lady walk) I wish I had a swing like that in my back yard, I wouldn't let any of my freinds come over to play

 

do you know what would look good on Her?... Me:thumbsup2:

 

I haven't seen a spread like that since the kentucky derby:big-grin-emoticon:

If bullS**t was music, You'd have a Brass Band

 

Scuba Diving is like a new marrage, always get to go down & get plenty of Bottom time:scubadive:

[Sailor]

Slimier than a snot covered doorknob.

[Uturn]

The ONE I always use is:

 

Trust Me! We're not on a date.

MIKE

[SilvrT]

my wife came up with this one last night...

 

I certainly have a lot of blockhead in me ... I'm one generation removed!

 

 

(and she was dead serious!)

[Celt]

these come to mind when dealing with management/foremen at my work .

Couldnt manage a hardon in a whore house. couldnt organise a piss up in a brewery and being unable to make a decision- up and down like a whores knickers .and in relation to my bad back of late- hunched over like a bulldog f**king a football.

funny how mine are all work related

[hipshot]

Her face is like 12 miles of bad road.

Beauty is only skin deep; but ugly is clear to the bone,

I have hung a weeks worth of wash on a shorter line than that.

She was so fat, when she sat around the house.......she sat around the house.

 

That's all I can think of now. Where is Rodney Dangerfield when you need him?

 

Yama Mama:hurts:

 

 

HERE's one for ya , kid.

"She's so ugly, she's make a freight train, take a dirt road"!

just jt

[stvmaier]

She's got a "Butter-face".....Her body's smokin, "butter-face"....that's a different story!!

[greg_in_london]

My mother-in-law is so frigid that when she opens her mouth a light comes on.

[Sailor]

The IQ of a dead vegetable and the personality of a snot covered doorknob.

Mouth breathing knuckle dragger.

[ArcsSparks]

My fav:

You could blow is his brains up 10 times & stick them up a gnats butt and it'd be like a BB bounsing around in a box car

[JuanMoTyme]

She's got butter face - everything looks good but her face.

Life is like a sh*t sandwich - more bread you got, less sh*t you eat.

If guns kill people - then pens cause spelling errors.

Well, even a blind squirrel will find an acorn every now and then.

Yep, real bright - takes um an hour and a half to watch 60 Minutes.

 

If brains were sh*t - you couldn't raise a stink.

If brains were dynamite - you couldn't blow your nose.

Edited November 30, 2008 by JuanMoTyme
Oh yeah - two more

[BEER30]

Busier than a one legged , flea infested dog .

I'm not as dumb as you look .

I hate to tell ya , your parents are guilty of the most serious sin...... having you .

If frogs had wings , they wouldn't bump their azz when they hop .

Balls , cried the Queen ! If I had 2 , I would be King !

 

 

Pardon him , he rides a 1st gen .

 

 

BEEER30

[SilvrT]

...and the one I use most often...

 

" I'm not your average dummy "