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  1. An elderly, Jewish man named Mr. Steinfeld lived in a nursing home. One day he was walking slowly down the hallway with his head down. One of the nurses saw this and asked "Mr. Steinfeld, is everything alright?" Mr. Steinfeld replied "No darling, my penis died today." Shocked, the nurse replied "I'm sorry to hear that." Mr. Steinfeld proceeded to walk slowly with his head down back to his room. The next day the same nurse saw Mr. Steinfeld walking down the hallway, but this time his pants were unzipped and his penis was hanging out. The nurse asked "Mr. Steinfeld, I thought your penis died?" Mr. Steinfeld replied "That was yesterday, today is the viewing."
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